Driving in What Lane? Hey!

Did you ever run into somebody you hadanna seen in many years? Well, it happened ta me da udder day. I was crossing Wisteria Lane ta pick up the newspaper because our newspaper boy is dysrexic. He always throws the paper on da opposite side a da street where you live. Just as I bent down ta pick up da paper I got hit in the bum by a delivery truck. It turns out that da driver was Connie Leitzoff, somebody dat I knew from da fifth grade at St. Mary's in da Greenwood. She was working for ADD Messenger Service and as da cop filled out the accident report we talked about her job. She used ta be a newspaper girl in da fifth grade. We used ta pick on her a lot in da fifth grade cause she couldn't stay focused and she would always yell out Hey You! when she wanted ta talk ta you. Da company started out as a Newspaper Distribution Service. A.D.D. is a wholly-owned subsidiary of Shimmy and Shake Communications Inc. located in Scranton, Pennsylvania. Dey been successfully distributing local and out-of-town newspapers to retailers and businesses since 1998. Da list includes The Unterrified Democrat, The Daily Boomerang and Da Birmingham Eccentric
In the past year der large and diverse fleet of vehicles has enabled dem ta incorporate the added feature of courier and freight transport services primarily but not limited to da local and tri-state areas. Der customers play a key role in der success so providing the best service possible is der number one priority.
It's a cutthroat business she said cause there are so many competing messenger services like da newly opened one, Aristophanes Frog Hoppin Messenger Service, which was started by a Greek guy from Meshoppen, but den branched out ta Scranton and vicinity. He started out with bicycles but den went ta mopeds and it's easier ta hear dem cause dey sound like high pitched buzzing bees or masquitas, instead a guys grunting on mountain bikes.

I saw Connie again da udder day after da accident. Dis time I knew she was coming cause she yelled Hey, You! out da window a her ADD Van.

The Coal Miner's Halter

Well, me n da Hellkat decided ta take some udder trips, but dis time closer ta home so we went down ta da Eckerley Coal Miner village and got the full tour.Before the 1850s Eckley was not a mining town, but a rural, forested community called Shingletown. It was located on land owned by the Tench Coxe Estate. The inhabitants took advantage of the surrounding woodlands and made shingles to be sold in White Haven and Hazleton. These goods were traded for the necessities of life, such as “whiskey, port, and tobacco”.

In 1853, four prospectors came to Shingletown and found that the land contained several veins of coal. Within the year these four men, Richard Sharpe, Asa Foster, Francis Weiss and John Leistering, formed Sharpe, Leistering and Company, later known as Sharpe, Weiss, and Company. Judge Charles Coxe of Philadelphia, executor of the Tench Coxe Estate, granted the company a 20-year lease for the establishment and operation of a colliery on these 1,500 acres of land. In 1854 the company began work on this, the Council Ridge Colliery.

By autumn of 1854, the company had constructed a saw mill to provide lumber necessary for the colliery buildings, such as the breaker, stable, and store house. They also began building a village to house the colliery workers. The scattered forest dwellings of the residents of Shingletown were quickly replaced by two rows of red wooden frame houses with black trim. This new village was called Fillmore, presumably in honor of President Millard Fillmore who left office in 1853. Several years later, the company applied for a post office for their town and learned that a town in Centre County had already appropriated the name. As a result, the town was renamed Eckley in 1857 in honor of Judge Coxe’s eldest son, Eckley B. Coxe who was then 17 years old. In later years, Eckley Coxe, an engineer, became involved in the operations in the town of his name. The first residents of Eckley were mostly English and Welsh immigrants who came from the mines in Great Britain. There also were Germans living in the village who were brought to the colliery as engineers.

By the late 1850s and early 1860s these colliers were joined by groups of Irish farmers who had immigrated to America after the devastating potato famine in their homeland. The Irish were generally unskilled in the field of mining and so received the lowest-skilled, lowest-paying jobs. Over time, the Irish learned the skills of mining and moved into better-paying, higher-skilled jobs. By the time of the 1880s and 1890s the low-skill jobs were being taken by the new wave of immigrants from Eastern and Southern Europe. These groups included peoples from Slovakia, Poland, Ukraine, Lithuania, and Italy. Once again, the new immigrants took many years to develop the knowledge and skills to move into the higher-skilled positions in the colliery. Many of these immigrants came to America expecting to work in the mines just long enough to save money, buy land, and return to the farming lifestyle they had known in Europe. Once they became part of the company-owned system, however, very few were able to escape the years of poverty and hardship that faced them.

Dis musta made an impression on me cause dat night I had a mystical vision/dream again widdout da chili. It was more like a movie. Richard Harris played da main character named Elton, who was a veteran coal miner who had once been da pit boss, but now a terrible accident befell him. He fell down a deep shaft and got lots of cuts and wounds on his way down, but miraculously da hyperbaric pressure a da mine began ta heal his wounds and he crawled out after many days a climbing. It turned out dat it was his own fault fer not checking his black mining safety halter and so fer years he wore it as a kinda penance. He later married Mary who worked in da apothecary and dey had many children. At da end a da movie his picture appeared on a billboard over da North Scranton Expressway advertising da Lackawanna Coal Mine Tour. Wow, what a movie!

What I Did for My Summer Vacation

Part I

Well, me n da Hellkat had ta curtaintail our plans fer a summer vacation a liddle dis year cause a da gas prices and cause doze boyz from der Cornell Aeronautical Lab musta adjusted my carburetor ta accept da rocket fuel cause I was gettin' lousy mileage wid my Renault. So we decided to go up ta Naples New York ta see Helen's cousin Susie Q- she's a widder with artistic tastes. Speakin' a tastin we did the usual winetasting tours up der in da Finger Lakes area. We even took da special underground tour a da wineries which was ta see all da big vats and involved squeezin tru narrow passageways.Some a da darker spots where dey couldn't git da electric lights, we had ta use candles.
After dat Susie Q. took us over ta meet her new boyfriend, annudder artist whose name was Nicola Nerdavelli. He was one a dose performance artists. His latest project was ta have 500 people dressed up in Bacchus costumes with rustic grapevines all over dem and have them ride across the hillsides on dose souped-up Segways. I Wished him luck. Dat night I had a dream about angels singing, like dose fat Cherubs in dose Italian paintings. The angels were coming to earth, but dey were chased away by big grapes on Segways.